The tiny hamlet of Pool notched up a notable hat-trick this week when Elsie Tanner (not that Elsie Tanner) was garlanded with the award for 'World's Oldest Living Human Being'. Elsie, 146, a Menston Juniors' supporter, put her longevity down to "living for longer than anyone else". Pool is also renowned for having the world's oldest professional cricketer, Stanley Arkwright, 98 when turning out for Yorkshire during a Second World War match against Warwickshire, and the world's oldest bell*.
It has been 224 days since Pool defeated Menston and sent their season into turmoil. Rangers have been relishing the opportunity to put things right against their local rivals. 12 consecutive league victories may have followed, but a nagging ache remained, a persistent dull pain in the background, a tooth that needed pulling. And today, Menston was presented with a dentist's chair, some pliers, and a large hypodermic needle.
The Juniors set about the task with aplomb, dominating the early skirmishes and looking the likeliest to secure an early advantage. Fleming and Boughan fought hard to control the middle of the field, and Ainsworth looked lively up front. However, Pool took the lead at around 20 minutes from the softest of goals when a pass back to the keeper lacked necessary momentum, and the fair-haired, slightly balding Pool striker was able to place the ball into an empty net. Rangers continued to press, but a second soft goal gave the home team a two-goal lead at the break.
Menston showed customary resilience in the second half. With about 30 minutes left on the clock, Ainsworth bundled the ball home, and when Fleming scored the equaliser a few minutes later, the contest was there for the taking. However, with 15 to go, Texel, ball in hands, was seemingly pushed to the ground by an onrushing Pool striker. The loose ball was put into the net, and the goal allowed to stand. Menston, down to 10, had it all to do. Despite throwing everything into the closing minutes, the score remained 3-2, title hopes vanquished.
In an understandable aftermath to this exciting contest, Elsie Tanner is no longer the world's oldest living human being. The search is on for her successor.

* - this fact is disputed